THE SHADOW EFFECT
The shadow is dark and secretive and can be dangerous. It carries everything that we don’t want other people to see. Things we hide, things that we lie about, not only to others, but to ourselves. We’ve been told from such an early age, that these are not acceptable components of who we are.
The shadow shows up in so many ways. Shadows are made up of the thoughts, emotions and impulses that we find too painful, embarrassing or distasteful to accept. Instead of dealing with them we repress them.
The birth of our shadow occurs when we are very young, before our logical thinking mind is developed enough to filter the messages we receive from our parents, caregivers and the world at large. Even if we have the best of parents, we inevitably got shamed from displaying certain qualities and received the message that something about us was not ok. That something was wrong with us. Or that we were bad.
These messages were ingrained in our subconscious like a computer virus, altering our perception of ourselves, and wounding our healthy sense of ego. When we suppress any of these qualities, we’re living in denial of who we are.
The wounded ego must hide all that we believe is unacceptable about ourselves. None of us likes to admit that we have these flaws and insecurities. So to hide them, we create a personna at a very young age. Our masks take many forms, they become our prison. We work hard to feel good about ourselves, and a moment later, do something to sabotage those good feelings.
When we deny ourselves a safe outlet to express our dark side, it builds up and becomes a powerful force, that is capable of destroying our lives, as well as the lives of others.
If you think about the beach ball effect. Trying to keep the beach ball under water. The beach ball pops up and hits you in the face. You keep trying to manage the beach ball. But it will always keep popping up in your face.
Shame can devastate our sense of self. But you can find your light through the darkness, as you move through your shadow and reclaim your light.
The shadow shows up in so many ways. Shadows are made up of the thoughts, emotions and impulses that we find too painful, embarrassing or distasteful to accept. Instead of dealing with them we repress them.
The birth of our shadow occurs when we are very young, before our logical thinking mind is developed enough to filter the messages we receive from our parents, caregivers and the world at large. Even if we have the best of parents, we inevitably got shamed from displaying certain qualities and received the message that something about us was not ok. That something was wrong with us. Or that we were bad.
These messages were ingrained in our subconscious like a computer virus, altering our perception of ourselves, and wounding our healthy sense of ego. When we suppress any of these qualities, we’re living in denial of who we are.
The wounded ego must hide all that we believe is unacceptable about ourselves. None of us likes to admit that we have these flaws and insecurities. So to hide them, we create a personna at a very young age. Our masks take many forms, they become our prison. We work hard to feel good about ourselves, and a moment later, do something to sabotage those good feelings.
When we deny ourselves a safe outlet to express our dark side, it builds up and becomes a powerful force, that is capable of destroying our lives, as well as the lives of others.
If you think about the beach ball effect. Trying to keep the beach ball under water. The beach ball pops up and hits you in the face. You keep trying to manage the beach ball. But it will always keep popping up in your face.
Shame can devastate our sense of self. But you can find your light through the darkness, as you move through your shadow and reclaim your light.
